Hi Deeksha, I was longing to write to you since long, but kept on denying for one reason or another. My problem is i guess one of the most common problems among married women- of having workaholic husband.
My husband is a good natured guy, who is fun to be with, but its onyl work on his mind 24*7. He loves to wrok, loves to discuss his work and wants everyine to just work and earn money. So much so that he doesn't have time to even spend that money. For what do we work hard and earn....? To live life peacefully na...but what is the use of sucess and money when one is not able to spend time with family or enjoy simple happy moments of life??
I had a word with my husband and disucssed that he should take it easy and enjoy his life too. At this he gets furious every time and say that this is the age to earn and one should only focus to that ??
As per him, we have full life ahead of us, to have vacations and enjoy time. However I feel the other way. I think the time gone now will never come again.
How can I make him understand the importance of today......?? please help....
Answered By: Deeksha Gyan
Posted On: 08 May, 2012
Hello Jaya , I an surely trying to understand your problem but one thing that caught my attention is when you said that your husband is a good natured guy and is fun to be with. This statement of your tells me that whatever time you get to spend together, must be good and fulfilling.Your husband is a focused guy, may be a bit too focused towards work but also makes sure to give time to family. You can try and make him understand that it is very important to spend some time away from the usual surroundings in order to de-stress and revive the senses that gives a fresher perspective to the personality and helps to enhance the performances in every arena of life. You can thus ask him to organize for a small vacation at least once for few days in a year's time, which may not be a cause of concern for him to be away from his work. Now the issue is his spending money for vacations and some facilitation that can bring happiness to you.Jaya , you will have to try and understand the basic thought process of your husband behind not spending money. Is it the money that bothers him and he does not want to send or is it the time he is not willing to spare. In both the cases , you will have to choose the course of your action accordingly.If he is willing to spend but has no time, then ask him to let you take charge and decide as to where the money is to be spent. Do it sensibly, spend it on the things that can add value to your lives. let him experience the benefits, and he may start taking interest himself in spending on necessities and little pleasure of life.Now, if he is a miser with money and does not like to spend, then you will have to let him be.There is no point pondering, arguing or cajoling him to go against it because the studies have proved that it is hard to bring change in the attitude of people who hold money very dearly and do not like to spend too much. In that case , you can try and look for ways to earn some money yourself enabling you to spend on things that make you happy and bring comfort to family life as a whole. Put some sincere effort , do not just rely on talking. I am sure the things will change for better. Keep smiling...:)